New baby. Ahh. Sweet. Breast or bottle? He likes breast, I like bottle? Bottle then. Which type? Nuk or Avant? Which teats? new born - seems too small, next size - too big. Doesn't like bottle, or is it the teat? Or maybe the formula? Change the bottle, no, formula? No, back to original bottle.
Hungry? Maybe, feed or no feed? cuddle or no cuddle? nappy change? what type of nappy? huggies for night and others for day. How do I clean that up that mess? Wipes or water? Crying (again). Hungry? No, Wet? No. Maybe cold (need more clothes?) or hot (take some off). Not sure. Tired? Yes, that must be it. Cot for sleep. Looks to little to put in the cot. Swaddle? Maybe. Arms in or out? Pop in a sleeping bag too or not? Still crying. Dummy? Give it a go. Nope, doesn't want it.
Going out, small or big nappy bag. How many hours will I be out? how many nappies and bottles? Should I take an extra just in case? Stroller or big pram? Where am I going again? Should I take a spare top for dribbles on me?
Hungry, maybe needs some real food. Rice cereal. Spit. No thank you. Maybe mixed with fruit? Nope. how about just fruit. Yep that works. Food everywhere, need to change clothes. Mmm, what can he wear? (what can I wear?) Jump suit or pants and top? Whats the weather? These will do. Oh, they don't fit. Bonds are small. Maybe pumpkin patch. Need new clothes. What size?
Teething. One tooth, two teeth - is that it? Is he going to sleep tonight? Panadol or not? Bonjella? Maybe Neurophen? Maybe a bottle. No bottle. Ok, teething stopped.
Toddling now. Need to move things. What can he hurt himself on? Need to baby proof fire, stairs (gate at top and bottom or just bottom, or just top?), draws and cupboards (which ones can he play in?. Move the cutlery up to another drawer.
Starting creche next week. What does he need to take? I need a new bag. Diago or Toy Story. V. important decision. Will it fit three change s of clothes? How will we all get ready in the morning? What time will I need to get up? Ashley will need to dress himself. How will we cope in the evenings? First day work. Drop off OK. Trains break down in the afternoon. Mmm, Murphy's law. Early pick up turns into late pick up.
Yuck, what is that in the nappy? Teething (nope - no teeth), oh, gastro. Not good. What does the book say to do? how long is this going to last. Need poo changing gloves. Wash everything. Bugger, i've got it now. Will I live? Maybe after today I will. Well again. No, spoke too soon, sick, cold this time. Doctor or no doctor. Try those nose drops. Oh, doesn't like those at all. Conjunctivitis now. Oh, I've got it too. Bugger. Send the germs back to creche. Home they come again. What are those spots. Please stop crying and just tell me what is wrong. Oh, hand foot and mouth now, and what's that - a tooth at the same time. Yippee. (NOT).
Back on foods. Need to move onto more chunky food. How about I mash with a fork not moosh with a machine. Please don't spit it at me. Ok, back to moosh. What's that - you like to eat it with your hands. Sure. Cough, are you choking. Yes, No. OK, you have your colour back and are laughing so must be a no.
And so it goes..... on and on and on. And that's just the baby brain. The toddler brain is working in there too, along with the wife one and the work one. Will I ever be sane again:-)
